Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Meckler: FTD = "Flowers Today? Doubtful"

Everyone here at SEM | ANTICS more or less agrees that while Alan Meckler is about as pioneering and techno-omniscient as they come, he certainly could use a little more sleep.

Straying from his typical 4:25 am "I predicted this [merger/sale/internet media trend/tectonic plate shift] would happen back in '96 and now it's happened, and you should have believed me" post, Meckler exposed his softer side - the love of a man for his wife - and how FTD now has his marriage on the skids.

Well, not on the skids, exactly. But still, he's pissed:
I searched on Google for online florists and went with a venerable brand - FTD.

What a huge mistake!!!!!!

. . .

Here it is early on Monday morning and my wife's flowers have not been delivered. I called FTD.com on Sunday at noon to inquire about the delivery time (first I inquired online and filed a complaint, but 12 hours later nobody has replied other than an automated response that things were busy over at FTD.com due to the holiday and that they would get around to responding --my question: "of course they were going to be busy on Mother's Day-what did they expect?"!!!). Back to the call: after 23 minutes, a clerk responded and told me that this was a busy day, but for sure the flowers would arrive - now 12 hours later, as stated, no flowers.
(Early Monday morning? Yes, 12:23 am, to be exact. One can picture Alan looking down at the street below as the clock ticks toward midnight, assembling phrases in his head, almost hoping the flowers didn't arrive...)

Here's where it gets a little silly: Only 8 hours later, Web Trends issued a press release about various online florists (primarily focusing on FTD) that praised FTD's search engine "visibility percentages:"

Just days before Mother's Day, most sites grew visibility in both paid and natural search engine listings with FTD.com and ProFlowers.com cultivating the largest gains, increasing their overall Visibility Percentages(1) by 8.33% and 6.75%. ... And it wasn't just a timely ramping up of paid search campaigns that increased visibility between these snapshots, as FTD.com and JustFlowers.com also grew their natural visibility by 1.92% and 2.25%.
Now note that this is a Web Trends release, not an FTD release. WT simply chose a seasonal example to showcase its web analytics abilities.

But if FTD is reading (and with our loyal following of three site visitors per month, how could they not be?), they'd be advised to pay much more attention to posts like Alan's than to releases like Web Trends'. And let us know if you ever deliver Mrs. Meckler's damned flowers.

And Alan, if you're listening, keep it up. But first, get some rest.

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